12/17/17 - Star Wars: Last Jedi (2017) - 4+/10

I would naturally say I was quite disappointed with Last Jedi, but I had no expectations nor undying love for the franchise. I took nothing into that theater and left with the same unfulfilled potentiality. I kept waiting for the film to turn that corner, to bring the exciting fulfillment of its promise, to be the joyous praiseworthy adventure it was destined to be. But, 2 and a half hours later, I shrugged my shoulders and gave a disheartened sigh.

This was a methodical Deus ex machina filled, constant “countdown=drama” regurgitated, plot over substance/logic cinematic bleed. This took different steps then what a generic next installment in a generic franchise might do, granted , but they still felt the need to slam the the fanboy buttons without worrying about a solid story or characters. So many moments of futility and vacancy while sliding through the product pieces and “variations” that did not connect with me.

I just didn’t think that it worked well as a film, not just a big budget Star Wars franchise film. Chunks of the plot & decoration were superfluous, weirdly obfuscated, or numblingly simplistic. Most of the characters lacked fleshing out, agency, or engaging sense. The visual style was solid with significant flashes, but nothing truly special or otherworldly. It wasn’t all doom & gloom, lacking all fun, but it just felt flat and uninspired. A film riding on its name’s reputation rather than steady film mastery or innovation.

I didn’t see much of the auteur vision from Mr. Johnson. There were some gorgeous shots (ala the silent aftermath of a Rebel cruiser and First Order fleet’s confrontation, drifting in space. That was cinematic with a capital C.) but the dialogue didn’t feel fresh (mostly hackneyed and out-of-place, to be honest) and a lot of the acting just didn’t click. I do think that Adam Driver’s Kylo Ren was the highlight of this film, bringing energy and actorly conflict. You could feel his passion. And, except for the quipy one liners, I liked Luke’s twist and older evolution. It made his grappling intense and fruitful. Poe, though some truly cringe worthy bits (“on hold” and “yo’ mamma” jokes), brought a vibrancy and realism to the proceedings... See, I liked some things.

I had read no reviews nor heard anything before seeing it myself. Checking around, I am SHOCKED to see the unabashed love for this film. We don’t all have to agree, but is there some blind love here? Did we all see different films? I am glad that so many love it. I wanted to love it. I am not preoccupied with being a contrarian but “the new Star Wars” isn’t very good. Perhaps I am judging everything too harshly, but I don’t think this is a good film. I love Rian Johnson’s previous works, but this is not a good film. I want Star Wars to be the cinematic touchstone that exploded my imagination and enraptured my dreams as a child, but this is not a good film. Just because it bucks expectations, conventions, and misdirects does not mean it does that well or fulfilling and most certainly does not make it a good film.

There was some opportunities for a terrific film, full of fun and emotion. But what we got, was a messy misfire. It isn’t awful or unwatchable. It just isn’t good. I don’t even have the passion to shout it out. It did not work for me.

Some spoilers laden thoughts. These are just a few of the things that stuck out in my mind:

• Snoke was pointless. Perhaps one of the worst conceived and executed villains and major characters I can think of in any franchise or big movie. His motivations, expectations, and purpose are all non-existent. His death, though shocking, made his entire creation meaningless. His unknown quality could help his menace, but he appeared to be being built up and it is a ball just dropped.

• The “revelation” of Rey’s parentage was inert and served no purpose. Not only being a throwaway, having it not even come from her on her own journey of self-discovery/protagonistic agency was lame. She doesn’t need major lineage but by giving her history to Kylo and having her major character arc fall flat left me dissatisfied.

• The masturbatory side quest of Finn and Rose was a futile whiff. It was a placeholder, with remedial rationale. There was no chemistry nor sense, in creation or execution. Plus, all of those race animals are getting captured again tomorrow for even worse treatment, those slave kids are going to die slave kids, and the entire glitzy eye-rolling poke at the military-industrial complex was not nearly as clever/biting as the filmmakers thought it was.

• Purple haired Laura Dern not only felt flat but was there only to bizarrely cause conflict. One sentence takes care of her entire problematic presence. Also, why wait until half the fleet has been destroyed before you do something? It was a suicide mission in the first place.

• Bombers! We must all ignore the lack of gravity to make the bombs fall, the lack of atmosphere to keep the bombers alive, and the need for them to be slow as hell. I understand the nod to WWII films/conflict and the drama inherent in the sequence, but my suspension of disbelief can only go so far.

• If a ship is destroyed and hundreds dead, the people next to you don’t appear 50 ft away to make a cinematic smokey entrance. Plus, again, Captain Phasma with her magic silver armor DOES NOTHING and IS WORTHLESS. To make a character you have to DO SOMETHING with that character, not just say she is important/cool/meaningful. Give her a win. Have her onscreen for more than 3-5 minutes. Porgs mean more than Phasma.

• Jedi powers are completely plot dictated. Maybe it is galaxy spanning telepathic convos, maybe it is force ghost lightning, or maybe it is simply untrained Lazarus magic space survival - truly whatever they needed to move things along, despite beggaring belief, they did. I am not going to be that stickler who shoves his glasses up his nose and says “you can’t do that!”, but we have 40 years of lore and precedent that didn’t involve ‘let’s just make them gods” willy-nilly overpowering. I didn’t hate all the changes, but give them context and meaning or they will come off as hokey and unbelievable. Guess which side of that line Last Jedi lived on?