1/3/18 - Bright (2017) - 3-/10

Do you ever have what seems to be a brilliant idea, so good that  you can’t believe no-one has thought of it before? Perhaps it is so good, you have no doubts and ask for no second opinions; you go full force ahead. But, you realize that once this amazing plan was enacted that it was actually a horrible misstep and failure, fundamentally flawed and devastatingly dumb. Well, that is this functional flop made manifest. The simplistic concept of Training Day in a world where we coexist with magic isn’t without merit, but in every aspect of execution (script, themes, casting, acting, story, innovation) it did not work.

Perhaps it all wouldn’t have been so bad if it wasn’t so blatantly insensitive racially and culturally. Yes, we get it. The other magical creatures are stand-ins for other races. You could try and make it a valuable social subtext instead of a disgusting simplified grossness. The juxtaposition of the black Will Smith “white cop” and the Edgerton orc “black cop” as a commentary is obvious. Maybe show some progression or intelligent non-cliched behavior to elaborate and flesh out relationships. Nope. It’s all shoved right down your throat with the skill and deftness of a waterboarding CIA interrogator. There doesn’t seem to be much thought or development beyond the basic ideological pitch.

Smith is annoying. Rapace is unused. Edgerton is fine, but struggles to flesh out from under the prosthetics. The direction is a paint by numbers cop action spectacle where quips and violence stand in for character and plot.

Every hint of true world building is eschewed for a cheap wisecrack or monotonous action piece. There is a mythology that they could explore, about a real history and changes that would arise from their mingled coexistence for thousands of years, but instead we get lame Shrek jokes and near zero difference to our actual reality. It is all too easy and surface level. It does not try and does not work.

A real swing at this with a group willing to give the entire conceptual framework a real concerted effort might lead to a unique and enjoyable world & story. But I think the groundwork has been laid out to grind out the same stinky sausage that we just sadly consumed. Thankfully (eye roll) we are getting a sequel to this dull and uninspired junk. Can’t wait. Serve it up. (harder eye roll)