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TRUMP vs. ILLUMINATI (2020)

7/28/21 - Trump vs. the Illuminati (2020) - 3+/10

When you read that title, many allusions might coalesce in one’s mind; a pseudo-documentary of Q-inspired MAGA merriment showing the God Leader’s behind-the-scenes fulfilling exploits, a Trump re-envisioned as a Rambo-esque ruffian patrolling the DUMBS to pump lead into Moloch himself, or maybe some right-wing Jesus-centric fantasy of Trump’s presidency smashing the secret cabals to stop adrenochrome extractions and “pizza” eating… Well, for worse or in my case much better, this is DEFINITELY not that. Perhaps a description of the first scene will better set-up what to expect. We open onto CGI of a dark chamber where an alien grey reincarnation (?) of Aleister Crowley, who speaks exactly like Cobra Commander or Skeletor, is chatting to a sarcophagus so as to commune with the Egyptian god Anubis about the prophecy that the escaped Chinese clone of Donald Trump will circumvent his thousand year exile on Mars to travel to Hell and overthrow Lucifer, a roided alien grey in a wheelchair. Yeah, this is a trip of a film that despite its quality can be somewhat fun. 

By no means get this twisted. This 70 min animated sci-fi oddity in the 25th century is not a good film. The CGI animation is bizarrely out of synch and almost looks like snippets of repurposed stock animation. The story is a farce and nonsensical. It's horny, over-the-top and.. Funny. Honestly, it leans into its wackiness and semi-lucid insanity. Whether it is the grey alien Crowley proclaiming his desire for masochistic buggery by the loins of Lucifer, the Han & Chewy like pairing of a Jack Van Helsing clone and space sasquatch bantering about food & f*cking, or the space suited Trump clone having a dance fight against a gang of grey aliens, it's all silly and evoked legitimate laughs. It is utterly ridiculous and it mostly steers into the absurdity rather than trying to ignore or skirt it.

I can’t say that anyone needs to rush out and catch this one, but it makes for a brief just over an hour blunderbuss of bonkers & buffoonery. I might not suggest it to the most hardcore red-hat wearing “patriots”, but it is dumb kind of fun that pushes the tongue so hard into the cheek that it melds like some Cronenburgian nightmare.